Saturday, October 26, 2013

Stream-And-Run, Halloween Edition: The Relic (1997)

                 Mimic this ain't...

                Truth be told, we just don’t get enough monster movies in horror nowadays. Everyone’s so busy with their torture porn and their found-footage nonsense that filmmakers have seemingly forgotten the simple pleasures of the movie monster. Which makes The Relic all the more disappointing: a big-budget studio monster flick that fails at just about everything it tries to do. The central idea of a creature brought back from South America terrorizing the patrons at a museum gala is not the worst idea for a thrilling horror movie, but a weak script and muddled direction keep the film from being anything worthy of attention. Peter Hyams is an exemplary cinematographer, but his abilities as a director are suitably lacking - while the film has a nice, ominous look, the quick editing and the lowlight photography is sure to leave viewers squining and scratching their heads in order to figure out just what the hell’s going on at any given time. The only aspect of the film that works at all is the creature itself, which should come as no surprise, considering it’s courtesy of the fine work of Stan Winston. I also liked Tom Sizemore and Penelope Ann Miller as the leads, but the undercooked script just never gives them anything to work with.  

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